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Why is my kitty so mean?

  1. #1

    Why is my kitty so mean?

    We recently adopted our first cat on the 19th. His name is Benji, he is a little under one year old and was nueterd on the 16th. He was found on the streets the week before with a coller.. nothing on it and some bite marks around his neck.



    They told us he was an outdoor cat. We went to pick him up on the 17th, but he was moved unexpected an hour away. On the 19th we drove and went to pick him up. Along the way he meowed and meowed. Fast forward to last weekend. He was the sweetest thing, loving my gentle petting. He didn't like being picked up... We took him for a walk so he would stop scratching at the window. And he slept with me the first day.

    Fast forward to yesterday. He was MEAN. We took him out for a walk, and he looked at me and meowed, and looked at our little greenhouse. I picked him up to the top and he was fine. About 30 seconds pass and he's looking at me meowing, so I try to pick him up and bring him down, and he hisses at me and swipe. I of course take it personally and tell him that he's gonna be stuck. About 3 minuets pas and he finally finds a way down.

    He walks around, and jumps on a bin. He starts rubbing his head and neck against the sides where his bite marks are. And he opens them up with blood showing. I try to take him down before he hurts himself, and he hisses at me even louder and swipe at me repeatedly.

    He scratches his harness and manages to get part of it off. I get mad at this point and I'm pulling lightly on the harness to get him down because I dont want to get bit or scratched. He FINALLY gets down, and he goes straight to my room. I am pissed at him and leave him alone for he rest of the day. The next day (today) I don't feel good and don't go to school. I play with the cat for 5 mins and leave him alone untill about 3 pm when he jumps on my bed.

    I cautiously pet his head, and he lifts it up, telling me to scratch his neck. I do and he's fine. So he leaves after a few minutes and then he comes back, and sits on my hand that was laying on the matress. He sits on it, and I rub his shoulder twice, which he doesn't mind, and then stop. 30 seconds later he bites my arm, claws at my shirt and leaves a small bloody mark. So at his point I fed up with his bitting, and I left out a bunch of times where he's mean, just so this isn't a news report of a question.

    So what's the deal? I know that this is a very stressful time for him, but he was so sweet the first few days and now he's this monster. He still sleeps with me but every time I get close to him, even just moving me leg he comes up to me and tries to bite me!!

    I wanted a cat to help me with my stress and a cuddle partner and a companion .. a friend to help me with my depression and anxiety, but he is only making it worse!
    Please help me understand!

  2. #2
    No one?
    Update: he is slightly nicer, but still pretty mean. I think he was neglected before he was lost because he eats any chance he has and eats much more then he should... And also drinks all the water everyday. He is all of a sudden very scared of me, just me, when I walk past him he runs away. I don't know why. As of this post we have had him for a week. He also hates any kind of petting unless he is asleep, he licks me when he's sleeping. His breath is horrible. Also, every time I hold him, or he's sleeping, he's farting or something because I smell poop or something. Don't know what's with that.

    Again if someone could help me out as to why he's doing this and how to get him to like petting and cuddling more.
    Thank you

  3. #3
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    Hi Meankitty. Your cat doesn't sound mean at all, after all you have to acknowledge that he was out on the streets and had been attacked by another animal. It's nice that you adopted him and that he sleeps with you. It sounds like you can pick him up, so that's not a big problem.

    His bite marks are obviously still causing him pain, discomfort or itching. I think you should be more patient with the little guy, he's been through a lot in his life and I don't think he's mean at all, just needs to gain trust and confidence. If he does bite, just calmly and quietly tell him no, be nice...you can't erase any memories he has or behaviors overnight. But you can with patience and a little bit of loving work. Plus you just can't play with him for 5 minutes and cut it off, long quality time with him in a quiet bonding mode will work wonders, and it's easy to do.

    Please don't call him a monster, he is not. You've only had him for a week, and he was an abused street cat with a questionable past, think about it. He's not going to feel secure and act perfectly with you in one day or one week, he has to trust you and feel comfortable around you. Only you can make that happen, remember he's not a person and doesn't think like we do, he's a vulnerable animal that you were good enough to rescue, but he needs reassurance, especially during this time with you.

    He may need to be checked out by a vet if his breath is bad, maybe his teeth need cleaning or other work. Passing gas is normal for dogs and cats, so if it's excessive, another reason for a check up by a doctor. You can't force any cat to be affectionate, but you can make them want to with quality time, plenty of fresh water and good food, clean litter box and basically some serious TLC. You get what you give with it comes to any pet.

    Good luck, don't give up and welcome to the forum!

  4. #4
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    I agree with Alpha, put his food and water down, keep his litter box clean then ignore him. Let him come to you on his terms. Its going to take a while for him to trust you, give him all the time and space he needs.
    he is your friend and protector, he will love you unconditionally, you owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion

  5. #5
    Thank you both. He is no monster, just the day he was being mean I felt he was. But he's getting better and I am trying my best to be patient. He's starting to do the love bites, but he bit my face gently I'm not sure if that's aggression or love bites... I'm still new to this.
    Again thank you for your help! We are taking him to th vet to get the bite marks checked out and the bad breath. I do my best to leave the walking cuteness alone... But it's hard... Very hard.
    Petting sessions are short.. not because of me but because of him. He dislikes petting at the moment. I do my best to get at least 15 minutes of casing the laser or feathers so all his Bengal kitty energy gets out on that and not on me.
    Picking him up... Is challenging. He meowes and makes clicking noises, but he lets me at least for the most part... There are time when I do lift him he kicks and I put him down. I'm trying my best to understand him so he trusts me.
    Thank you.
    Last edited by Meankittykitty; 01-26-2017 at 07:34 PM. Reason: Forgot to add details

  6. #6
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    You didn't say he was a bengal. Bengals are not your average house cat, they can be a real love bug but at times the "wild" still comes out. And none of them like to be picked up. As sweet as mine can be he does not like to be picked up. He will sit on my lap and do the little love bites, head butts ect but picking up is not allowed. You might want to consider getting him a kitty veranda, that way he can go out but can't really get out, it has a kitty door so he can go in and out but its all caged in so he can't get out of the box, mine loves his. He likes to go out there and lay in the sun and amuse himself watching the squirrels and chipmunks but can't get out to kill anything. Its a wonderful investment and he would enjoy it and a bengal is smart enough that just show him how to use the kitty door once or twice and he'll be able to go in and out at will.
    he is your friend and protector, he will love you unconditionally, you owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion

  7. #7
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    this is what it looks like

    he is your friend and protector, he will love you unconditionally, you owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion

  8. #8
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    Yes, Bengals are not typical average cats and can probably be a bit more challenging, since he was out on the street, I'd say he's doing very well now. More advice is clipping the sharp tips off of his nails with a tiny clipper for cats, or have them do it regularly at the vet. Less chance of getting scratched up. Also, mine still gives the odd love bite now and then, he never goes to hurt and has never broken skin, so as far as I'm concerned it's just a sign of affection.

  9. #9
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    Love bites.


  10. #10
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    One day Penny was babysitting for a friend and brought the baby over in a carrier, Orri was facinated by the baby, he'd put his paw, claws not out, on the baby's head and cheek almost like he was petting him, never tried to scratch or bite the infant, he didn't know what it was and was just checking the baby out. Had it been awake and moving his hands and feet I don't know what he would do but it was sleeping and he just touched him lightly and watched him
    he is your friend and protector, he will love you unconditionally, you owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion

  11. #11
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    Lightbulb

    This is what I am getting from your description:

    You picked up a cat who previously had bad experiences with other people, so he needs some time to trust you. In addition to being a Bengal he also does not have a known history of being cuddled since his previous family kept him outdoors all the time. He is not a kitten anymore, which makes it even harder to make him become a nicer cat. In addition, you just put him in a completely new environment that would be very stressful for even the nicest kitties. On top of that, the cat could be in pain because of the animal bite that warranted a vet appointment. Can you see where I am going with this?

    As for the farting and stinky breath, a good quality food (grain-free and all-natural with no fillers or preservatives) should help. You can get a lot of good advice on that in the Health and Nutrition forum.
    Rescued is my favorite breed. Don't shop, adopt!

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