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If Our Pets Could Talk, What Would They Say?

  1. #76
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Western NC
    Posts
    514
    Saav: Oh no, Pooks. Mom's upset. Poor Mom.



    Pook: What's wrong?

    Saav: Molly has a cold again and stopped eating. Mom just got her back from the vet and she has to take that nasty medicine again.

    Pook: Oh dear. You go comfort Mom, I'll comfort Molly.

  2. #77
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Western NC
    Posts
    514
    Pook: Crap! One of the kittens knocked Mom's ring off her shelf! We gotta find it!

    Saav: Which one was it?

    Pook: The sapphire and diamond ring. Fan out, Saav,we gotta find it!

    Saav: I found it. Must have rolled under the bed. What do I do with it?

    Pook: Hahahahahahahaha!!! Put it back on her ring dish. She'll think it was there the whole time and missed it.

    Saav: Haha! I can do that!

  3. #78
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Posts
    7,437
    Phoenix: the sun is out, lets go play mom

    Me: in a minute Phoenix, wait till I get off the phone

    Phoenix: You're always on the phone, tell whoever it is you'll call them back later

    Orri: Phoenix why don't you watch and learn, when we want something we just unplug the phone

    Sandy: yea we do it all the time, and only when mom wonders why she isn't getting any calls or can't call out then she checks and sees its unplugged

    Nanny, she knows we did it but she hasn't caught us yet

    Phoenix: Ok guy, first thing in the mornings you unplug the phone so I can have my play time before she notices
    he is your friend and protector, he will love you unconditionally, you owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion

  4. #79
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,858
    Elsie: Look Mommy, I can do what Maru does! (runs into empty box on the kitchen floor)

    She is one of my sister's cats (not the black newbie).

  5. #80
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Western NC
    Posts
    514
    LOL!!

  6. #81
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    2,251
    Silky: MOM!!! Look, in there....in the closet!

    Me: Silky, i'm busy making lunch, could you just tell me?

    Silky: I would if I could but I can't tell. It....it smells like catnip!

    Me: What? Catnip?? But.......

    Silky: Come look.

    Me: Fine...........................Oh! it's only your new stuffed mouse I got you last week.

    Silky: Really? I never saw it! Give it to me please please please!??????

    Me: Fine.

    Silky: Rip tumble! Scramble!.........(a little later)

    Me: Oh silky, you ripped it to shreds! Well, I guess I put a little to much catnip on it! Lol
    I love my chicks and they love me!

  7. #82
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    2,251
    Tweety: Mom, where is Silky?

    Me: Ummm..I'm not sure. Go find her!

    Tweety: Mooom! Lol you no I can't, I'm in my cage!

    Me: Oops, I forgot, I'll just call her.....SILKY....SILKY come quite I have a little catnip for you!! (Listen, look...)

    Silky: Catnip??? Where when how!!>>!>???

    Me: Yikes!

    Tweety! Wow!

    Silky: Where is it?

    Me: Right there...Silky where did you come from?

    Tweety: Silky, you really scared mom..he he he...

    Me: Tweety!...

    Tweety: Oops, sorry mom...

    Me: Never mind Tweety! Now Silky, where were you?

    Silky: In the pantry....

    Tweety: (whisper) You should not of done that.

    Me: Silky! You no you should not go in there!

    Silky: wellllll.....

    Me: I'll let it go this time, but DON'T do it again.

    Silky: Ok, I won't.
    I love my chicks and they love me!

  8. #83
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    Location
    California
    Posts
    11
    Every time my outdoor cat comes home. She looks at me like "I will starve you to death human"

  9. #84
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    Location
    California
    Posts
    11
    What slave human do with my poop

  10. #85
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    2,251
    Me: Tweeeeeetyyyy, where are you?

    Tweety: in here....

    Me: Where?

    Tweety: TWEEEET TWEET! Let me out! Let me out!

    Me: Oh tweety, what is happening?

    Tweety: Here I am! (On my shoulder)

    Me: What happened?

    Silky: Hahaha hehe

    Me: Silky!? What did you do!

    Tweety: She chased be....again!

    Silky: It's fun hearing Tweety scream.

    Me: I know Silky but you know that is not nice.

    Tweety: Mom's right!

    Silky: Yes, well....its fun....

    Me: Maybe I should not let you play together anymore.

    Silky: Noooo!

    Tweety: No way! Please?

    Me: Well, you can't fight..

    Silky: We were not, just playing.

    Tweety: yes, just "playing".



  11. #86
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    13,129
    Bigfoot: Loki, mom's getting ready to take me to the park, wanna come?

    Loki: No way! You're a nice doggie, but there are some at the park who I don't trust.

    Bigfoot: I know what you mean, safer if you just stay home.

    Loki: Good idea, mom will let me out in the yard when you guys get back, that's good enough for me!

    Bigfoot: See ya!

    Loki: Have fun Bigfoot!

    Bigfoot: Hi Loki, what have you been doing while we were gone?

    Loki: Wha?? Oh, I must have just woken up from a nap, didn't hear you guys pull up.

    Bigfoot: Now I'm tired from my walk and ready to get some shut-eye.

    Loki: Headed out to see what's going on outside, sweet dreams Bigfoot!

    Bigfoot: Thanks Loki, see you later, be careful out there!

    Loki: All the time!

  12. #87
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    2,251
    LOl, funny Alpha!

  13. #88
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    2,251
    Tweety: Silky, you want to play with me?

    Silky: Sorry, I want a nap.

    Tweety thinks: "Oh good, when she goes to bed, I will beg mom to let me out and then I will attack silky...for the very first time!

    Tweety: Mooooom, moom, can I get out of my cage? Please? Pretty please!

    Me: Alright tweety, just a sec.

    Tweety thinks: Good, I'm so glad!

    Me: Come on! Lets go, I have to shut you in a room, remember?

    Tweety: Do you really have to?

    Me: Yes. Sorry.

    Tweety thinks: I guess my did not work after all.

    Silky: I was watching you the hole time! I new what you wanted!!!

    Tweety: Yes....but.........

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